It is estimated that there are 5 million orphans in Ethiopia. Soon it will be 5 million minus ONE!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Say What???

We have been home just shy of 3 months now and have been leaving the house much more with Baby E the past few weeks. We definitely receive many double takes when we are out some more discreet than others. Yes, I have one child who is very fair skinned with almost white hair and another who has dark skin and masses of curly black hair. Yes, I am the mother of BOTH of these children!
I am surprised at some of the strange things people say, or how they think they can stop you and ask you 101 questions about my baby's history and not consider themselves rude. It is just so bizarre. When you have a child that looks like you, no one will stop and ask a single question about that child. But, when a child looks different than you, why do people feel like they can ask anything about that child. I just don't get it!

Here are a few of the craziest questions or statements I have heard so far:

1. Does she speak her African language? Me-"She is just a baby; she doesn't speak yet." (What the heck?! She looks no where near old enough to talk.)

2. I have never seen one up close; she is adorable. - Me - "You have never seen what up close, a child?"

3. Oh, how wonderful of you to adopt an orphan! We are so proud of you! Clarify-We did NOT do anything wonderful!!!! We wanted another child now we have one. Baby E lost the chance of truly learning how to be an Ethiopian woman, to learn her country's traditions and culture without a book, her ability to become a native speaker...need I go on.

3. What does "your little boy" think? Me-" It is his sister and he loves her."

4. What does "your husband" think? Me-Well, her father loves her.

It is difficult to just walk away when my 4 year old, the proud big brother, wants to share everything he knows about his sister. G states,"This is my baby sister, E! She is from Ethiopia; that is in Africa!" I am happy he is so proud. My son sees his sister. He does not see that she looks different than us. He doesn't realized that the majority of families in this area do not have adopted African children or adopted children at all. All he sees is his family, a father, a mother, a brother and a sister. He will be started preschool this fall and I worry about some of his innocence being broken and gone forever. I wished we lived in a world where everyone accepted all types of families whether tradition, adoptive, or non-traditional.


  1. We have a fairly decent community of African American people here in Kansas City so we don't get stopped all that often but people do tend to ask the dumbest questions. People usually ask "are ALL of these kids yours?" Like I would bring extras along just for fun? HA!!!

  2. I have heard all these comments before and more... "Are they REAL sisters?" Umm, yeah.
    "Are they twins?" Umm, no.
    "Are they from Haiti?" My girls are Ethiopian.
    "How much did they cost?" Nothing.
    "Why was she taken from her birthmother?" She was not TAKEN from her birthmother. She was relinquished.
    "That's a weird place to get one from, don't ya think???" My husband and I don't think so!

    Like you, I could go on and on! She's beautiful, and your family is, too. I wish we lived closer!